Okay, I went to this thing.
It's called Beit Midrash, which anyone who read the title would probably have guessed.
Now, a Beit Midrash is kind of where orthodox people go to study the Torah. So no, I did not go there. But at school this evening there was an event on Hillel, who was a rabbi a very, very long time ago. (I'm not sure quite precisely when - in the time of the first Temple, if that's any help.) So I decided to go, because my parents said I should, wondering if this was a really, really bad decision, and studied a few of the things he said and stuff he did, part of which we'd already done in Israeli Heritage class. It was obviously quite boring (my hand was thoroughly written and drawn-on by the end), but I don't believe that the decision to go was the worst I ever made. Plus, we had some great cakes after it. That was brilliant and it almost made up for the boringness.
A conversation with a friend from another class:
"Was yours boring too?"
"Oh yes. My parents said I should go because I'll never have this ever again. So I went, even though I was sick this morning."
"Evil."
"I suppose. But it's passed, and I'm not dead."
"It's passed, there's nothing you can do about it, and you're still alive."
"Precisely what I tell myself after every day."
"After every day?"
"Well, you know, being around you people, it's hard not to."
"Why does everyone say that?"
"You do understand the meaning of sarcasm, don't you?"
"Well...takes a bit to sink in...but yeah..."
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Ode to Homework
Homework, O Homework,
how I despise thee
with your dastardly questions
and time-consuming monstrosities,
and projects and studies
and diagrams and tests.
I'd light you on fire -
you annoy at best.
And though teachers say
that you're easy and fun,
wherefore, oh wherefore
hath anyone begun
to torture us children,
poor beasts as we are
with assignments and workbooks -
when did they start?
Homework, O Homework,
please do go
to the remote mountains
of ice and snow
or volcanoes and fire-pits -
doesn't that sound lovely?
If you went, I'm sure
that we'd all love thee.
And maybe, just maybe,
we'd all be friends!
Homework, O Homework,
I beg of thee, END!
how I despise thee
with your dastardly questions
and time-consuming monstrosities,
and projects and studies
and diagrams and tests.
I'd light you on fire -
you annoy at best.
And though teachers say
that you're easy and fun,
wherefore, oh wherefore
hath anyone begun
to torture us children,
poor beasts as we are
with assignments and workbooks -
when did they start?
Homework, O Homework,
please do go
to the remote mountains
of ice and snow
or volcanoes and fire-pits -
doesn't that sound lovely?
If you went, I'm sure
that we'd all love thee.
And maybe, just maybe,
we'd all be friends!
Homework, O Homework,
I beg of thee, END!
You Shall Not Run
So I've found that when I sit in one place and do nothing (specifically, while watching YouTube or Doctor Who or reading) my nose runs less.
I am resolved to move as little as possible today. Not that that's a major deviation from what I normally do when provided with a computer and a library and some art stuff.
By the way, has anyone else realized the irony of saying that "feet smell" and "noses run?" No? Okay, fine, I'm alone.
Though I would like to mention that when the great lexicographer Samuel Johnson was told by a lady that he "smelled," he said, "No, madam: you smell; I stink." There you go, nice tidbit of knowledge for you. Now you should probably go look up "lexicographer," because in all respect you probably don't know what it means.
I am resolved to move as little as possible today. Not that that's a major deviation from what I normally do when provided with a computer and a library and some art stuff.
By the way, has anyone else realized the irony of saying that "feet smell" and "noses run?" No? Okay, fine, I'm alone.
Though I would like to mention that when the great lexicographer Samuel Johnson was told by a lady that he "smelled," he said, "No, madam: you smell; I stink." There you go, nice tidbit of knowledge for you. Now you should probably go look up "lexicographer," because in all respect you probably don't know what it means.
The Language Enthusiast
A few days ago I decided I'd go on Google translate and look up the words for time/age/era in the sixty-five languages Google has deemed important enough to take the time to translate.
In German one word for time or tempo means Kleenex.
In another language (Indonesian? Don't remember which) "river" can mean time.
I found many languages in which a word for time is also "story" or "path." Oh, connections. This is why languages are cool.
In German one word for time or tempo means Kleenex.
In another language (Indonesian? Don't remember which) "river" can mean time.
I found many languages in which a word for time is also "story" or "path." Oh, connections. This is why languages are cool.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Nookify
I brought my nook to school today.
"Is that a Samsung Galaxy?"
"No. It's for reading books."
"From outside the country?"
"Yeah."
"What's that?"
"It's for reading books."
"Whoa, cool!" ("cool" was substituted for various words - "awesome," "great," etc.)
"What the hell is that?" (although they used much worse language)
"It's for reading books."
"God, what do you do with your life?"
"Stuff...or, in your view, nothing."
"I can see that."
Books. Are. Cool.
"Is that a Samsung Galaxy?"
"No. It's for reading books."
"From outside the country?"
"Yeah."
"What's that?"
"It's for reading books."
"Whoa, cool!" ("cool" was substituted for various words - "awesome," "great," etc.)
"What the hell is that?" (although they used much worse language)
"It's for reading books."
"God, what do you do with your life?"
"Stuff...or, in your view, nothing."
"I can see that."
Books. Are. Cool.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
The Science of Respecting Stuff
Me: La
Me: La
Me: LA
Me: Respect the LA.
Me: Indeed. You must.
Me: Very important.
Me: No one will get this.
Me: Do I care?
Me: No.
Me: You're right, I don't.
Me: Respect the LA.
Me: La
Me: LA
Me: Respect the LA.
Me: Indeed. You must.
Me: Very important.
Me: No one will get this.
Me: Do I care?
Me: No.
Me: You're right, I don't.
Me: Respect the LA.
Mayumana
I went to this show called Mayumana Momentum today.
It was in Jaffa, and we had to drive there because it's Shavuot (a holiday) and there aren't any buses. May I just say that driving in Tel Aviv/Yafo is the worst? I mean, firstly I'm not so used to sitting around in cars anymore and secondly, it's all so complicated. Plus, you can never find parking. We were lucky in that respect.
Mayumana is a group that does something sort of similar to Stomp. Except not. It's a cross between dancing and singing and acrobatics and acting and drumming and playing music and audience participation. And it's really cool. But loud, too.
This particular show had a theme of time. There were clocks everywhere and quotes about time that were projected onto a screen before each act. And then that screen lifted up to reveal this grid-thing where the dancers/actors/musicians could climb up and each person had their own box where they danced and sang, backlit by lights, and they also performed on the stage. They had this really cool recording thing which they could press and it would play back the music they'd already created and they could record another part over it, which they also did with cameras: they would film something and project it onto the screen, sometimes filming something else and adding it. Oh, it was all brilliant.
They made the show mostly in English and movements, so most people would be able to understand. Even if you didn't speak English, you could get it from the actors' gestures, and in any case it was more about the music and dance.
All the performers were insanely adept at guitar, drumming, and singing, as well as being extremely strong and flexible. At first I thought, "Oh, I could do that," but it soon became apparent that there was no way at all.
In any case, Mayumana was really great. If you find yourself in Jaffa, I encourage you to go.
It was in Jaffa, and we had to drive there because it's Shavuot (a holiday) and there aren't any buses. May I just say that driving in Tel Aviv/Yafo is the worst? I mean, firstly I'm not so used to sitting around in cars anymore and secondly, it's all so complicated. Plus, you can never find parking. We were lucky in that respect.
Mayumana is a group that does something sort of similar to Stomp. Except not. It's a cross between dancing and singing and acrobatics and acting and drumming and playing music and audience participation. And it's really cool. But loud, too.
This particular show had a theme of time. There were clocks everywhere and quotes about time that were projected onto a screen before each act. And then that screen lifted up to reveal this grid-thing where the dancers/actors/musicians could climb up and each person had their own box where they danced and sang, backlit by lights, and they also performed on the stage. They had this really cool recording thing which they could press and it would play back the music they'd already created and they could record another part over it, which they also did with cameras: they would film something and project it onto the screen, sometimes filming something else and adding it. Oh, it was all brilliant.
They made the show mostly in English and movements, so most people would be able to understand. Even if you didn't speak English, you could get it from the actors' gestures, and in any case it was more about the music and dance.
All the performers were insanely adept at guitar, drumming, and singing, as well as being extremely strong and flexible. At first I thought, "Oh, I could do that," but it soon became apparent that there was no way at all.
In any case, Mayumana was really great. If you find yourself in Jaffa, I encourage you to go.
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Neve Tzedek
Yesterday after school, my mom, my brother, and I took a bus to Neve Tzedek.
Neve Tzedek is one of the oldest neighborhoods in Tel Aviv. It's got a kind of small-town feel to it in a way, but the taller buildings are always looming in the background.
We went for lunch at a place called Suzanna, but it was a bit rushed because we had to get to a show (which admittedly was in the building across the street, but still). It was a dance performance called Oyster, which is still going after ten years and is celebrating its anniversary at the Suzanne Dellal Center, which is one of the celebrated dance theaters in the country.
Oyster is unconventional, to say the least. All the dancers wear wigs (I'm still wondering how they didn't fall off) and have their faces painted white. The show is presented kind of like a carnival sideshow event, with one short piece after another. One piece includes dancers with rods connecting their hands and feet, and another has an extra-tall man pushed around by a ballerina with a stool attached to her behind. There's one where a dancer is hanging from a pulley, and one with "armless" men. I thought it was amazing, the way that they folded themselves and fell and stretched. And I suppose the weirdness of it was what made it amazing. It makes you want to do something not-so-normal because you can.
After that we went for gelato and went home. I studied some French. It was brilliant.
Neve Tzedek is one of the oldest neighborhoods in Tel Aviv. It's got a kind of small-town feel to it in a way, but the taller buildings are always looming in the background.
We went for lunch at a place called Suzanna, but it was a bit rushed because we had to get to a show (which admittedly was in the building across the street, but still). It was a dance performance called Oyster, which is still going after ten years and is celebrating its anniversary at the Suzanne Dellal Center, which is one of the celebrated dance theaters in the country.
Oyster is unconventional, to say the least. All the dancers wear wigs (I'm still wondering how they didn't fall off) and have their faces painted white. The show is presented kind of like a carnival sideshow event, with one short piece after another. One piece includes dancers with rods connecting their hands and feet, and another has an extra-tall man pushed around by a ballerina with a stool attached to her behind. There's one where a dancer is hanging from a pulley, and one with "armless" men. I thought it was amazing, the way that they folded themselves and fell and stretched. And I suppose the weirdness of it was what made it amazing. It makes you want to do something not-so-normal because you can.
After that we went for gelato and went home. I studied some French. It was brilliant.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Fresh Bread
I went to a bakery today and bought a baguette.
It tastes SO MUCH BETTER than supermarket bread. Now, I suppose that would go without saying, but I sort of forgot how good a fresh bakery baguette is. Last time I ate one of these was a few months ago at least. Perhaps not since Boston.
So, here are a few steps to the location of one subspecies of Afternoonus Awesomus:
1. Go to a bakery.
2. Buy a fresh baguette.
3. Eat it while wasting time on YouTube and Facebook or watching Doctor Who.
Cheers!
It tastes SO MUCH BETTER than supermarket bread. Now, I suppose that would go without saying, but I sort of forgot how good a fresh bakery baguette is. Last time I ate one of these was a few months ago at least. Perhaps not since Boston.
So, here are a few steps to the location of one subspecies of Afternoonus Awesomus:
1. Go to a bakery.
2. Buy a fresh baguette.
3. Eat it while wasting time on YouTube and Facebook or watching Doctor Who.
Cheers!
Leaf Crunching
On the way to my house from practically everywhere, I pass this tree.
Now, this tree is no ordinary tree. Each leaf is twenty centimeters (about eight inches) long at least. And when they're just dry and crumpled enough, they make the most wonderful crunching sound.
I love crunching leaves here because they don't come in mounds like they do in Massachusetts. Plus I love the sound. It's so satisfying.
Today I was walking home from the bus-thing (it's a monit kav hamesh, but never mind) from Dizengoff Center, and I realized that the tree had shed an extra-lot of leaves and they were awesomely dry and crumpled. So I crunched them.
It was awesome. Perhaps the highlight of my day.
(I should remind you that I am over five years old. But who cares?)
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Lacking Something to Do
Me: Homework.
Me: Is boring.
Me: You haven't done any today.
Me: True.
Me: Do you have any today?
Me: Maybe.
Me: Go check.
Me: No.
Me: Do you have anything else to do?
Me: Can't you see I'm blogging?
Me: For the sake of doing something, yeah.
Me: I'm blogging. Very diligently.
Me: Right. Of course you are.
Me: Hey!
Me: I wasn't disagreeing.
Me: Shut up.
Me:
Me: Lovely, now I've got no one to talk to.
Me: Like you had anyone in the first place.
Me: Hey! You should be the first to assert that talking to yourself is fun.
Me: Why me? You should be the first one. I'm the voice of reason. I don't deal with such frivolity.
Me: Nyeh, nyeh, nyeh. Reason takes all the fun out of life.
Me: I heard that!
Me: Of course you did. We're both in the same brain.
Me: Who's reasoning now?
Me:
Me:
Me: Fine, I'll go check.
Sigh.
Me: Is boring.
Me: You haven't done any today.
Me: True.
Me: Do you have any today?
Me: Maybe.
Me: Go check.
Me: No.
Me: Do you have anything else to do?
Me: Can't you see I'm blogging?
Me: For the sake of doing something, yeah.
Me: I'm blogging. Very diligently.
Me: Right. Of course you are.
Me: Hey!
Me: I wasn't disagreeing.
Me: Shut up.
Me:
Me: Lovely, now I've got no one to talk to.
Me: Like you had anyone in the first place.
Me: Hey! You should be the first to assert that talking to yourself is fun.
Me: Why me? You should be the first one. I'm the voice of reason. I don't deal with such frivolity.
Me: Nyeh, nyeh, nyeh. Reason takes all the fun out of life.
Me: I heard that!
Me: Of course you did. We're both in the same brain.
Me: Who's reasoning now?
Me:
Me:
Me: Fine, I'll go check.
Sigh.
Bye Bye Ponds
(If you know which Doctor Who episode the title is kind of from, you are awesome. If you don't, you are awesome too.)
Okay, I'm posting this here because I think my Facebook friends will kill me if they see another Doctor Who-related status. Yeah, I'm pretty bad with that.
Karen Gillan and Arthur Darvill have wrapped up filming Doctor Who. I'm sad. Ish. But I don't think they're finished until we get to see them go. So HA, Ponds, you're not done yet. I just hope neither Amy nor Rory dies...which currently seems very plausible.
(Sorry to any non-Whovians. I had to.)
Okay, I'm posting this here because I think my Facebook friends will kill me if they see another Doctor Who-related status. Yeah, I'm pretty bad with that.
Karen Gillan and Arthur Darvill have wrapped up filming Doctor Who. I'm sad. Ish. But I don't think they're finished until we get to see them go. So HA, Ponds, you're not done yet. I just hope neither Amy nor Rory dies...which currently seems very plausible.
(Sorry to any non-Whovians. I had to.)
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Archaic Writings of Moi
I've been reading over my old poems. It's fun and it makes me feel like such a self-centered genius because I think, "oh hey, these are pretty decent!"
I also came across a story that I started in fourth or fifth grade. To be perfectly honest, erm...it's absolutely terrible. It is so very cliché and repetitive in the field of word choice. Not that I've made much improvement in that sense on first drafts, but when I go back and read it I think I might have spent more time choosing the font and formatting than actually writing. Whoops.
But at the same time it's amazingly okay, because it's not much more than you'd expect from me back then. You kind of look at it and say, wow this is terrible. Makes you think of the fact that you're so much better at word choice, grammar, and just general story-making.
As for showing it to other people...I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon. *reads it over again* Yeah, I don't think it will happen...EVER.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
The Annoyance of Builders
So we're having the building renovated. Not big things, they just mostly fixed up the outside, along with a few touch-ups on the stairwell.
Right now they're re-doing the walkway and the patio (I don't know what else to call it). Each day either the front or the back door is blocked, so people have to go around depending on where they're going.
Twice now I've annoyed people by walking in the wrong place.
I'm not one for taking the long way. Long ways annoy me. So when I have to go around, I try to shorten it a bit. One time I walked on something that looked right and solid to me but supposedly wasn't.
"Why, why, why?" said the guy who saw me. "Just go around like a normal person!"
"Sorry, I didn't know."
"What do you mean you didn't know?"
I just went around. May I say that no harm was done to the cement whatsoever: it stayed flat. No footprints or dents or anything.
Then today, I got home from ballet and took a look at the front door. It looked blocked-off. I went around. That looked blocked-off too. I went around, then back again. I decided to take my chances with the back door.
Then someone got out of the elevator from inside.
"Can't you see it's blocked off?"
"So is the front door."
"The front door is open."
"Well, it doesn't look like it."
Can I make a point that I walked on the same piece of patio this morning and I avoided the parts I knew were wet? How stupid do they think I am?
So I walked around to the front door. Turns out the tape was only tied from the wall to the doorknob and the door was not blocked at all.
"Thanks much?" I muttered angrily, ripping the tape off the doorknob.
I stomped upstairs. Building is annoying.
Right now they're re-doing the walkway and the patio (I don't know what else to call it). Each day either the front or the back door is blocked, so people have to go around depending on where they're going.
Twice now I've annoyed people by walking in the wrong place.
I'm not one for taking the long way. Long ways annoy me. So when I have to go around, I try to shorten it a bit. One time I walked on something that looked right and solid to me but supposedly wasn't.
"Why, why, why?" said the guy who saw me. "Just go around like a normal person!"
"Sorry, I didn't know."
"What do you mean you didn't know?"
I just went around. May I say that no harm was done to the cement whatsoever: it stayed flat. No footprints or dents or anything.
Then today, I got home from ballet and took a look at the front door. It looked blocked-off. I went around. That looked blocked-off too. I went around, then back again. I decided to take my chances with the back door.
Then someone got out of the elevator from inside.
"Can't you see it's blocked off?"
"So is the front door."
"The front door is open."
"Well, it doesn't look like it."
Can I make a point that I walked on the same piece of patio this morning and I avoided the parts I knew were wet? How stupid do they think I am?
So I walked around to the front door. Turns out the tape was only tied from the wall to the doorknob and the door was not blocked at all.
"Thanks much?" I muttered angrily, ripping the tape off the doorknob.
I stomped upstairs. Building is annoying.
"Imagine" by John Lennon
Today in Israeli Heritage class we were analyzing John Lennon's "Imagine." Don't ask why it was in Israeli Heritage class, that's another story.
As we analyzed it, I realized that its ideas are communist. Everything belonging to everybody, no religion, no heaven or hell. Very communist.
As we analyzed it, I realized that its ideas are communist. Everything belonging to everybody, no religion, no heaven or hell. Very communist.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Wednesday
Normally I hate Wednesdays. They're the longest school days of the week - 8:45-2:45 - and it's annoying, even though in America I was at school for longer each day. The main reason of my dislike of Wednesdays is that I have three double classes - three classes of ninety minutes each, plus a forty-five minute class. It's tedious.
However, today seemed to be more okay than usual. I mean, obviously Grammar class was boring as ever, but we always have recess between the two classes and the teacher generally arrives at least ten minutes late for the second class. Israeli Heritage is an alright class anyway, and it was forty-five minutes. Besides which, it was quite an interesting conversation-class to listen to (sometimes I like listening to debates more than participating in them).
Then came English.
Now, obviously I'll be the first of my class to say that English is awesome, for obvious reasons. It's nice to have an opportunity to speak English to a teacher because you have to. Although I suppose the thing I like best is that I can make a total mess of the languages and every person in the room will understand. Unless I use really big words, like sesquipedalian. Which is an awesome word which means "a person fond of long words."
But today's first English class was one of the awesomest ones ever. Why? Because there was no class. Later (in the second class) we found out that our teacher had been with a student in the library and had forgotten entirely that she was supposed to teach our first class (a variation of this has happened before). I had hilarious conversations with my friends who are boys (NOT boyfriends, just to be clear, and I am not a polyandrist). Over the course of these conversations I realized that (1) I have had more ease in making friends with boys here than girls and (2) my friends who are boys have exceedingly perverted views of the world. I also swore a few times, at which they kind of stared at me for a few moments before going back to their own (and rather more heavily-loaded with profanity) points to make.
In the second class, the teacher came in, which was a sad end to our hilarity, because we had to complete a quiz. It was okay in the end, though.
After that we had math, which is usually the boringest of borings. (And yes, I know "boringest" is not a word!) But today another of my friends who are boys sat next to me. He's a math genius, so half of the lesson was us sniggering in the back of the class, laughing at the "leaning tower of Pisa"s we'd made by sticking our pens in holes in the desk (apparently, someone in a class before us was really, really bored and in possession of something sharp), and the other half was him answering questions intelligently and going through the class/homework faster than anyone else.
It was a good day. At least until I re-injured my back in ballet class (I injured it on Sunday and I thought it had healed). What will I tell the PE teacher tomorrow? I had to sit out last class too...sigh...
However, today seemed to be more okay than usual. I mean, obviously Grammar class was boring as ever, but we always have recess between the two classes and the teacher generally arrives at least ten minutes late for the second class. Israeli Heritage is an alright class anyway, and it was forty-five minutes. Besides which, it was quite an interesting conversation-class to listen to (sometimes I like listening to debates more than participating in them).
Then came English.
Now, obviously I'll be the first of my class to say that English is awesome, for obvious reasons. It's nice to have an opportunity to speak English to a teacher because you have to. Although I suppose the thing I like best is that I can make a total mess of the languages and every person in the room will understand. Unless I use really big words, like sesquipedalian. Which is an awesome word which means "a person fond of long words."
But today's first English class was one of the awesomest ones ever. Why? Because there was no class. Later (in the second class) we found out that our teacher had been with a student in the library and had forgotten entirely that she was supposed to teach our first class (a variation of this has happened before). I had hilarious conversations with my friends who are boys (NOT boyfriends, just to be clear, and I am not a polyandrist). Over the course of these conversations I realized that (1) I have had more ease in making friends with boys here than girls and (2) my friends who are boys have exceedingly perverted views of the world. I also swore a few times, at which they kind of stared at me for a few moments before going back to their own (and rather more heavily-loaded with profanity) points to make.
In the second class, the teacher came in, which was a sad end to our hilarity, because we had to complete a quiz. It was okay in the end, though.
After that we had math, which is usually the boringest of borings. (And yes, I know "boringest" is not a word!) But today another of my friends who are boys sat next to me. He's a math genius, so half of the lesson was us sniggering in the back of the class, laughing at the "leaning tower of Pisa"s we'd made by sticking our pens in holes in the desk (apparently, someone in a class before us was really, really bored and in possession of something sharp), and the other half was him answering questions intelligently and going through the class/homework faster than anyone else.
It was a good day. At least until I re-injured my back in ballet class (I injured it on Sunday and I thought it had healed). What will I tell the PE teacher tomorrow? I had to sit out last class too...sigh...
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